Idiot checks, mini-robes, exposed ankles, and…matching Nikes?
What it's like to be a member of the biggest (literally) band out there.
By Michelle Gilzenrat

What's it like? Apparently, exhausting. When I arrived backstage at the 99X Upstart Fest at the Masquerade Music Park, Polyphonic Spree bassist Mark Pirro was nowhere to be found. No worries, there are plenty other band members to chat with. I was introduced to Jessica Jordan, choir member, and we made our way to the quiet back sofas. I was just about to sit down when I noticed a body strewn across the duct-taped cushions.

“Oh! There’s Mark!” Jessica explained.

She thought it would be best to let the road manager tackle rousing him from his nap. While Mark rubbed his eyes awake, Jessica and I began discussing the logistics of being in a touring band with 24 members.

You just went over to England recently. How did the travel arrangements work out?
Jessica: It’s really not too bad. We fly over and then had a chartered bus type thing take us to the hotel. It’s four to a room, two to a bed…but, I guess any of the hardships that [others] would expect us to have we are just so used to. It doesn’t really faze us much.

Do you all hang out together when seeing the town?
Jessica:Well, it’s kind of a big group. Even though for the most part we have common interests, there are a lot of people who have their own separate interests. So like, everyone kind of clusters up with people that they tend to hang out with more. But the nice thing about this band is that if you hang out with one group for a while and you kinda want to change it up a little bit then you go and get a different perspective from another group and it’s really nice.

Do you feel like you know everyone in the band?
Jessica:You are definitely closer with some people than others, but it’s really cool to be able to pick someone else’s brain that you might not usually get to-- experience another walk of life.

What do you do when it’s time to eat?
Jessica: If we are on a tour bus in the US and there is Super Wal-Mart a lot of times we’ll stop there just because it so convenient. You can get everything. We don’t eat as a whole group much because there are so many people. In our dressing rooms we’ll usually have a fruit tray, a vegetable tray, a meat tray, coke and beer, something for everyone. It’s pretty normal.

How do you keep track of everyone when you are on tour?
Jessica: We do head counts and idiot checks . That’s what we call them. Because there’s always some person who will oversleep…for the most part everyone really does try, but you’ll always get a straggler or something. You know, when everybody has left the venue there has to be someone who does an idiot check because it will be like, “oh, somebody’s lost their robe” or “oh, that’s weird there’s a keyboard sitting over here…”

Has anyone ever gotten lost or left behind?
Jessica:There’s been a couple times when we’ve had to turn around. I don’t think we’ve gone too far without someone…but yeah, there’s been a couple times where people have been left and they’ll call us from the gas station and they’ll be like “come on, I’m only your drummer ” or something.

Speaking of leaving out band members--it was at this point a stretching Mark Pirro joins us at the table.

Mark: So, Jessica was telling you about the time she got left at the gas station?
Jessica: (laughing) No! Not me.

Well she left it more anonymous…
Mark: Yeah, you don’t want to be that person. There’s kind of this system of checks and balances. You don’t want to be that guy who says “hey man, you left me at the Shell station.”

Read what else Mark had to say on Page 2